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Restoring a Culture of Truth
By Suzanne Ennis
One of the rewards of working in the Pro-Life movement is access to the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. It may be good, bad, or ugly, but truth abounds in the Culture of Life as it drives away the darkness that is so widespread today.
You can hear it in the stories that women friends have told me over the years, stories that were close to their hearts. Here are three of them.
In the 1960's, long before Roe vs. Wade decriminalized abortion in all 50 states, my friend Theresa was a teenager facing an unexpected pregnancy.
Theresa says she was anxious, but determined to keep her baby, who is now in his late 40's. Her father had other plans. He insisted he would take Theresa to have an abortion. She refused, and, in that era before Roe, the law was on her side.
"I told him if he tried to make me get an abortion, I'd call the Sheriff," says the now contented grandmother and retired office worker.
And if these events had taken place ten years later?
"I guess I couldn't have fought to keep my son" she says, her eyes full of encouragement for a woman who is now her son's age and very much engaged in a battle to save babies like hers.
On the other hand, Liz and her son were among the first victims of Roe v. Wade. She faced her crisis in 1974, just one year after Roe.
Liz now says, "My parents and I would never have chosen abortion if it weren't legal."
But they bought the lie that Liz's baby was "just a blob of tissue" that would simply be expelled by a saline abortion.
She found out the awful truth when she was left there to let the chemicals do their worst, burning the baby to death inside a terrified and hurting Liz. She "gave birth" to the tiny, well-formed baby all alone.
"I named him Stephen," she says, "and baptized him with my tears".
Liz, now a mother of four children in their 20's, has used her bitter experience to help inform others. She had the courage to tell her kids about her terrible mistake and now the whole family joins in the March for Life in Washington D.C. year after year.
And then there was Michelle, who was in her mid-30's when she found out she was pregnant ten years ago. She and her husband went to a crisis pregnancy center, where Pro-Life staffers gave them the book, "What to Expect When You're Expecting." They encouraged them to keep their baby.
"We looked through the book and said 'We can do this!' We left there and wondered what we were thinking, that we could even have considered not having the baby."
When Michelle told me her story, I was running a campaign at church to spiritually adopt babies in danger of abortion. The next phase of the project was a group trip to the
mall to buy parenting books for moms-to-be.
We donated dozens of copies of "What to expect When You're Expecting" that same year to be given to other women like Michelle who were seeking the truth, not just the truth about abortion, but about what it means to "Say Yes to Life."
That truth is sadly lacking in public discourse and in the media today. However, it is the truth that will set us free and restore us to a Culture of Life.
All names in the above story have been changed to protect the anonymity of those who shared their stories with us.
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Moms Are Today's Heroes
We hear a lot about women who have abortions, but much less about today's real heroes -- the 77% of American women who have never had an abortion and wouldn't have one no matter what. They are the Moms who are raising the children who will become America's future workers, parents, teachers, and leaders in every field. Thanks to them, America is still a pro-life country. We salute them.
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Pro-abortion politicians will give Planned Parenthood $1100 for every baby they abort in the U.S. this year. To win the battle against abortion, we need to a) defund Planned Parenthood and b) prevent future abortions through preventive education aimed at young people 13-30. That's when 80% of all abortions occur. Your gift can help change young hearts and minds about abortion before they happen. Just click on the donation button. Or mail your donation to: Movement for a Better America, Inc, PO Box 472, Mt. Freedom, NJ 07970. And thanks for your donation.
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Prayer for the Unborn
O Mary, bright dawn of the new world, Mother of all the living, to you do we entrust the cause of Life. Look down, O Mother, upon the vast numbers of babies not allowed to be born, of the poor whose lives are made difficult, of men and women who are victims of brutal violence, of the elderly and sick killed by indifference or out of misguided mercy. Grant that all who believe in your Son may proclaim the Gospel of Life with honesty and love to the people of our times. Obtain for them the grace to accept that Gospel as a gift ever new, the joy of celebrating it with gratitude throughout their lives, and the courage to bear witness to it resolutely in order to build, together with all people of good will, a civilization of truth and love, to the praise and glory of God, the Creator and lover of life.
Pope John Paul II, closing prayer Evangelium Vitae
Homeschooling: A Pro-Life Beacon
by Anna Marie Barvick
Today in America a battle rages between the forces of life and death. Pro-life advocates are fiercely defending life against the evils of abortion, euthanasia, embryonic stem cell research, divorce and homosexual "marriage."
The blatant disregard for the sanctity of life has unforeseen consequences, including increases in random school shootings, promiscuity and child abuse. The coarsening of our sensibilities results in more brazen movies, television, music and dress.
How can parents protect their children from this dulling, deadening culture? A youngster, from infancy through the teen years, needs to grow up in a positive, nurturing atmosphere. They must be allowed to become the persons they were created to be. For many, homeschooling is a life-affirming solution. For others, it is a necessary measure to avoid having their children stolen from them morally, spiritually, and religiously.
Homeschooling parents usually keep a close eye on books, TV, movies, music and dress. Wholesome is in; profane is out. They realize that negative, destructive forces need to be controlled or eliminated.
This does not mean that a homeschooled child can't have fun! The average homeschooler is enrolled in 5 or more activities (sports, volunteering, art, music, politics, dance, debate, theater, etc.) with 98% engaged in at least two or more, according to Dr. Brian Ray of the National Home Education Research Institue.
Individual, natural abilities are also taken into account. The child educated at home is valued for himself. His talents are strengthened through coursework and extra-curricular projects. If a child is adept at English or math, he doesn't have to waste time on easy drills. He can move ahead and enjoy more in-depth enrichment projects.
Or, let's say he is interested in swimming. He can participate in daily practice and weekend meets without any harm to his education. Class and study times can be flexible in homeschooling.
On the other hand, if a youngster struggles in a certain subject, more time and effort can be devoted to helping him stay abreast. If math or reading is a problem, the parent can slow the pace until lessons are thoroughly understood. This can help avoid the need for remedial work later on.
It is a well-known fact that the child who is home educated does well academically. This, in turn, is reflected by test scores.
In an independent study of over 20,000 homeschooled youth, Dr. Lawrence M. Rudner of the University of Maryland found that the "average/median homeschool students outperform at least 70-80 percent of their conventionally schooled peers in all subjects and at all grade levels. Studies show the longer a student is homeschooled the higher his scores become."
Not surprisingly, colleges and universities have taken notice and many actively recruit home taught high schoolers.
The homeschooled student can be introduced to the best of the best. He makes friends with Shakespeare, da Vinci, Aristotle, Aquinas, Chesterton, Bach, Bernini, Milton and more of the greats. He learns to appreciate truth and beauty.
He can also freely learn and express his faith. Many parents who teach their children take pains to carefully instruct their children in their religious beliefs. God is always welcome in the homeschooler's home. In many families, He is the King!
That's just not possible in public schools. I recall talking about the life issue with a high school teacher who is a devout Catholic. He freely admitted, "There are certain things I can't say here. After all, when I'm here, I am an agent of the state."
When I heard that, a chill went down my spine. As a homeschool parent, I am free to encourage my children's noblest aspirations, a freedom that teacher doesn't have.
I find it touching to watch a small child draw a picture of Jesus fishing with his apostles without fear of ridicule or embarassment. A homeschooled child is allowed--in fact, encouraged-to talk about his guardian angel, make up a song a Biblical hero, weave a crown for the Blessed Mother with pipe cleaners, re-enact the visit of the Three Kings, or hold and caress the baby Jesus. Try that in public school!
Careful attention is given to character formation. The youngster is expected to develop the virtues and lead an honorable life. He can ignore Madonna, Brad, 50 Cent and Bonds. There are more interesting and relevant role models.
People who struggled with problems and set-backs, yet ultimately soared to great heights through determination, courage, humility, and sheer hard work...Augustine...Dickens...Helen Keller...St. John Vianney...Lincoln...Rosa Parks...St. Peter! (How many times did he goof? Yet his is one of the most recognizable names in history!)
The very talented who had smoother paths also set examples of responsibility, kindness, self-sacrifice and humility... Aquinas... Washington... Florence Nightingale... Michelangelo... Edison... Robert Louis Stevenson... St. Therese of Lisieux.
Parents who are with their offspring constantly can closely monitor them. When they do well, confirmation and praise are immediate. If there is a problem, the youngster is promptly corrected. This prevents problems from creeping in and taking hold.
He also receives support and encouragement from like-minded youngsters. Although he has a variety of acquaintances, he primarily socializes with and forms friendships with other homeschool children.
He gets the messages--It is cool to study. It is cool to be kind. It is cool to help little sister climb on the playground. It is cool to pray.
Children and teens who are taught at home understand and affirm the sanctity of life. They are well-prepared to engage in the struggle to advance the cause of life. That's why homeschooling is an ideal antidote to the culture of death, and a shining light for the future.
Anna Marie Barvick is an enterprising Catholic wife, mother, homeschooler, and developing website producer all rolled into one. She has her own homeschooling website at her place.
Natural Family Planning:
A Better Way?
By Robert Flaherty
“This is a time when couples must work together to renew our understanding of Christian teaching on love and marriage and to share that with our children and grandchildren in terms they can understand.”
The speaker was Dr. Leonie Watson, MD, an expert in natural family planning, who is a graduate of Georgetown University Medical School and a certified fertility care medical consultant. She is also New Jersey’s leading advocate of the natural procreative technology method developed by Dr. Thomas Hilgers at Creighton University Medical School.
According to Dr. Watson, “NaPro -- as it is called -- is highly effective and eliminates the need for couples to resort to artificial contraception or the Pill.”
“There is never any reason why anyone has to take birth control pills," says Dr. Watson. "If you request an alternative to oral contraceptives from your doctor, and he says there is no alternative, get in touch with me and I will explain the alternative to you or to your doctor.”
She adds that the same thing applies to couples seeking help for infertility through in vitro fertilization. “There are alternatives that greatly reduce the risks to both mother and baby.”
She admits that natural family planning message is difficult to “sell” to young people in an age when they get their information about love and marriage from TV, movies, and sex education classes in school -- hardly sources that emphasize the unselfish giving of couples to one another in Christian marriage.
She is often challenged, “Come on, Dr. Watson, get back to the real world.”
The reality is that many otherwise well-informed people have little knowledge of the latest developments in natural family planning that are in keeping with their beliefs.
The result, says Watson, is that “they get very little of the authentic, beautiful teaching about Christian marriage, and the churches are labeled as ‘out of touch with reality.’ In fact, it is by living according to our most deeply held beliefs that we attain happiness and security for ourselves and our children.”
She says, “The fact is that NaPro is just as scientific as the technology for artificial contraception, but it cooperates with the natural functioning of a woman’s body. It doesn’t prevent conception. And it doesn’t ever destroy the newly formed human baby, the embryo or fetus in the womb.”
The approach requires teaching and followup along with medical consultation, and it can be used throughout a woman’s reproductive years to monitor, maintain and evaluate her procreative and gynecologic health.
The program has two aspects:
1. The education phase called Fertilicare “teaches responsible parenthood for achieving or avoiding pregnancy, timing conception, pregnancy evaluation, as well as instruction in aspects of our sexuality beyond the physical -- including the spiritual and psychological.” Says Dr. Watson, “Marriages will be stronger if couples are aware of the spiritual, intellectual, communicative, creative and emotional aspects of their relationship. The goal is to improve marital bonding which is at the core of healthier, happier, and holier family living.”
2. The second aspect comes into play when women experience difficulties such as irregular cycles, infertility, recurrent miscarriage, ovarian cysts, unusual bleeding, premenstrual syndrome, or even the effects of stress.
“The NaPro system is tailor-made for each patient and her needs. It is medically safe, reliable, relatively inexpensive, natural and cooperative. It respects the dignity of women and men as equal partners in the marital relationship. It also fosters improved communication between them, which results in a fuller, richer life together.”
Contrary to popular opinion, birth control pills “don’t really cure anything,” asserts Dr. Watson. “They change normal function to abnormal. Even if the patient’s function is abnormal, they don’t fix it. They simply alter the hormone balance to something definitely abnormal.”
Essentially, they are synthetic hormones which replace the normal estrogen and progesterone that is made by a woman’s body. A woman releases a mature egg from her ovary once each month. Birth control pills prevent that normal process from happening.
Yet doctors now use the Pill for a variety of reasons, from regulating a woman’s cycle to treating ovulation problems, cramps and even acne. “But they never restore normal function,” Watson says.
What is often lost in the process is the beautiful concept of marriage as a sacrament. The movement toward same sex marriage is a reflection of this.
“Our culture is saturated with the ideas of self-gratification, sexual pleasure, and a 50-50 approach to marriage. Marriage is seen as a contract, rather than as a spiritual covenant between a man, a woman, and God.”
As a result, we experience such consequences as these:
Children are often seen as commodities, symbols of achievement to be acquired at our convenience, as long as they don’t threaten us financially.
Fidelity has little significance. We become intimate before marriage, often without commitment and with more than one partner.
We all know the statistics. Divorce, abortion, STDs, abuse, and unhappiness in marriage are nearly as common among religious families as among the general population. The very idea of marriage is being deconstructed so that society no longer sees it as something unique and holy, but as no different from any other relationship -- including some that are its polar opposites or which can be renegotiated or discarded at will.
Dr. Watson says married couples need to ask themselves: “Do religious beliefs have any relevance in our current world or are we going to submit our most intimate relationships to a purely utilitarian, secular standard?”
She left no doubt about her belief that it is up to married people themselves to carry the message to young couples -- who care about one another, and who want the best for themselves and their children -- that natural family planning is the better way.
Meanwhile, support for natural family planning is growing.
In New Jersey, for example, three-session courses for couples are currently being offered at St. Clare's Hospital, Denville, NJ. For information, call 973-890-9008. For information about FertilityCare call 973-361-4808. To learn more about the Couple to Couple League, call 973-838-3731. Or for information about becoming an NFP instructor, call Marie Ryan, family life consultant for the Paterson Diocese, at 973-777-1818, ext 264.
For information on how to contact Dr. Watson, or about any of these programs, email us at: info@movementforabetteramerica.org
Telling Children About the 'A' Word
By Eileen Hart
As a pro-life parent, how do I tell my children about abortion?
I have four small daughters, age two to twelve. I would love to keep them innocent as long as possible. But they happen to have a mother who is becoming more involved in the pro-life movement each passing year.
What do I tell them when I am going to picket outside an abortion clinic?
How do I tell them about the frequent seminars that Mommy is helping to run where teens hear first hand from a woman who has had an abortion or from a former abortionist who confronts the teens with the truth that abortion is another word for murder.
As a stay-at-home mom, my kids' lives and mine are very much intertwined. When their mother is missing for most of a Sunday afternoon, they can’t help wondering: “Where is Mommy?”
It is a very challenging situation to be in. I don’t want to frighten my kids, because, let’s face it, abortion is a gruesome business.
However, I don’t want to sugar coat it, because I feel that my childrens’ spirit and consciences are being formed now, and I would like them to grow up to become young women who value life.
I believe that children can understand the life issue. It is all in how we present it to them.
My oldest started asking questions after she started learning how to read. One day she was helping me as I printed out material for the “Celebrate Life” seminars I help lead for The Movement for a Better America.
As she helped, she began reading the printouts, and suddenly wanted to know what an abortion was.
The first time she did this, she caught me unprepared. How do you explain abortion to a child without upsetting her?
After much thought and prayer, I decided the best thing to do was to tell her that unfortunately there were babies in this world who didn’t get a chance to be born.
She didn’t ask any further questions about how that exactly happened. It was all she needed to know at the time.
My approach, at this point, is to use any opportunity placed before me as an opportunity to talk about life in terms even the youngest can understand.
When we had an unwelcome critter in our kitchen, my children’s first reaction was to stomp on it and kill it. It wasn’t welcome, so why not kill it?
I have since shown them, that we can remove the spider or ant from the house without killing it by simply putting it on a napkin or in a jar and releasing it outside.
I remind them, we don’t have to kill living things just because they happen to be unwelcome. We can continue to let them live, away from us if need be.
I try to teach them respect for our turtle and our fish. I teach them not to pull leaves off branches because they are bored. These are all living things that need our respect.
I like to think that learning to reverence all life as a gift from God will hopefully carry over to all areas of their life.
While I was pregnant with my third child, the older two would watch a video “Before You Were Born,” which showed a living baby in the womb. It was done in a very beautiful way, and it was a great visual for them which confirmed that “Yes, that is a real human baby inside of Mommy. Yes, there is another life inside Mommy, even if we can’t see it.”
I do not believe in exploiting my children or any children to promote a cause. I wouldn’t bring them with me to picket an abortion clinic, but, my husband and I do bring them with us when we march with pro-life friends in local parades.
We march carrying roses (the symbol for the unborn), and they enjoy these events like any other parade. A prayer vigil for the unborn in church would also be something my two oldest would certainly understand and absorb.
I also want to encourage my children to stand up against causes that are unjust, and to bear witness for their own deepest beliefs. I want them to realize that you cannot be silent when something wrong is going on.
But I want to make sure they learn to do that in a loving and peaceful way, in much the same way as Jesus spoke to us when he shared his parables.
One of the last prayers we say together as a family at night is:
“We pray for all the unborn babies - that they get a chance to be born.”
My children have accepted this prayer and say it with childlike fervor. They even now discuss as they get older what they may have been doing in heaven with God while they were waiting to be born themselves.
This tells me that they are starting to realize that they were special to God before they were even conceived (though they don’t use those terms). Thus, they are drawing the connection between themselves and the babies that we are praying for. And if they are special, then these other children that we are praying for are also special.
My hope and prayer for them is that they will always believe that human life is precious and that unborn children should always get a chance to be born. In time, they will grow up and go out to meet the world. I want them to be able to do so on God’s terms, not the world’s.
Eileen Hart is one of today's very ordinary heroes, a full-time mother who doesn't hesitate to share her pro-life witness with others. She lives with her husband Bill and their four children in a small town in New Jersey. If you have a similar experience to share, please contact us at: info@movementforabetteramerica.org
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The Facts Speak Loudly 17% of all abortions occur before women reach age 20! 73.4% occur before age 30! 97% occur before age 40!
Clearly the best way to prevent abortion is through preventive education starting with young people in their early teens, and following up all through young adulthood. And yet how few of our churches and schools have effective preventive education programs at all.
We've pioneered programs that have increased the number of strong pro-life teens by 75% and overall pro-life attitudes by 40% or more. There is no reason we should be losing this battle.
But to win it, we urgently need your help. Please give as generously as you can today.
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"We must rear our youngsters in a positive, wholesome, faith-filled atmosphere that encourages the development of nobility, responsibility, courage and discipline," says Anna Marie Barvick in her terrific homeschool-living website . . . It's well worth a visit.
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